IT WAS THE BIZARRO OF TIMES, IT WAS THE WORSTARO OF TIMES.

by Stylus Bazaar

supported by
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $7 USD  or more

     

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.

credits

released December 25, 2018

All vocals, instrumentals, and album art by M.G. Sweeney.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Stylus Bazaar Atlanta, Georgia

Just your friendly neighborhood rap group consisting of two robots and a squidman. Nothing to see here, move along.

contact / help

Contact Stylus Bazaar

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A DOVE
ILLI

blown out bellies at the top of mountain tops
at the last party your neighbors had to call the cops
i really like donkey ears because they go flop
i popped a balloon just to watch the fucker pop

i shot myself a man just to watch his heart stop
i love my snot collection it is sectioned into crops
your mom is so hot in the summer watch me watch
i see her take off her cloth nakie time is hot

PILLZ

and i stop to see the ladies when the british are invading
dont give me a look like i dont know what im saying
ill be spraying you with hoses while you model in some poses
then we get cozy with a stogie buy a dozen roses

the best part of the bible were the parts about moses
i focus all my power on picking famous peoples noses
we are your your saviors because we are the bizarro chosen
we'll leave you frozen with the help of icy blue potions


CHORUS

Your mothers a dove, your mothers a dove
i'm the reason youll never find love x4


ILLI

i know you dont want to see me open up this can
theres a very tiny fan at the center of my hand
and i plan to take the world over with my family fam
we're squidy at the center and we like to eat ham

bam! i just blew your mind
the time that ive wasted i have traced to a mime
i interregated him but he didnt tell me shit
the mime was spiteful and too legit to quit

CoLONP

silence is golden i wish it was a lotion
if mcneal is weed then i am holden
im foldin your clothes im dating a lesbian
gilbert goffrey is my number one favorite thespian

lets go eat at bennigans go act like we are men again
i like super duper sour birds they taste like lemon hens
when you see me on the internet your always calling shenigans
my number one hobby is painting pretty poison pentagrams

CHORUS

ILLI

its illithid from philly kid can you hear my sonic bids
i filled my fridge with hydroponic pigs
try yo tonic with a little bit of cid
see the world with tantric tunnel vision

get in my kitchen! and bake me a horse!
meat from a horsie is my secret power force
i teach a course at your community college
ill teach all you kids to be motherfucking scholars!

PILLZ

hollar at your boy when you see him unemployed
the economies the best in our bizarro void
my number one joy is christopher lloyd
he went back to the future OY OY!

COLON P

bizarro pillz your such a punk rocker
i like you so much i have your picture in my locker
my father was a boxer my mother was a copper
they both kicked ass and were really good at soccer

CHORUS
Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A WHALE
hi my name is hi my name is hi my name is
illithid baby
i got gravy in the front seat and a trunk stuffed with lunch meat
watch me drive by as i'm sippin on the sun screen

i come clean as i bang a maid in a confessional booth
i know what she had for lunch, i'm an intestinal sleuth
an impregnable dude, i've never been kidnapped
i like intelligent food, kim ung-yong bibimbapped

i got sim slapped with a meaty yoga arm
i got a bunch of roman dudes at my dreamy toga farm
when in rome, do as the roman dudes
one time i got high and thought what if gary coleman grew?

ooooohhh whoa now i know kung fu
i like french kisses cause they taste like tongue stew
i like stench pisses cause they smell like asparagus
just wait in the car because you'll embarrass us


your mother's a whale, your mother's a whale
i'm the reason you're going to jail x 4


yo i'm chillin with divorcees in palm tree weather
i love me a horsey but like your mommy even better
tie my tentacles to a pole and play a game of tether ball
flog me pour on the hot wax and shop at the leather mall

and you better call saul sashimi get steamy in the sauna
i'm looking dreamy in the conga line leave me for the stronger guy
with knee highs and no panty lines i can't breathe right in longer lines
i binge watch michael j fox in family ties

i'm a family guy no peter griffin hey listen i'm mad annoying
i can't sleep or count sheep cause your dad is snoring
got a hook for a hand, i am the candy man
go home and, be a family man

check my flat top and biceps star spangled tattoos
cash crops and mic checks sonic boom blast you
and cast you in the corner start the corner pressure
don't call me jigsaw hell naw i can torture better
Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A CAT
chillin with my boys lloyd banks is swank
mc lars thanked me with a shank for pancakes
its a fake ID time me see me wank
im the fastest fapper famous rapper dapper dank

your laughter stanks eat a mint god damn it
close your mouth bow out my house and can it
and i planned it, a beautiful picnic
rappers eating lunch, god there's no limit

my business is a figment, a fraction of a minute
if you got beef see my neice she will bring it
she's 5 years old she eats mold and can sing it
pick up your phone i know your home and its ringing

king me, i inspected her checkers they were chilling
ive got bling in my grill chill man damn its fillings
ive got billions of billings from millions of killings
mc lars you are hard gangster at large in the building

CHORUS

YOUR MOTHER'S A CAT/YOURMOTHER'S A CAT/
I'M THE REASON/ YOUR BODY IS FAT



if you can heal me i can be your tank
ya feel me?! i can plan your wake
you stank! like a potent skunk weed
if your head is itchy i'll rub lotion in your weave

you best believe i'm taking no prisoners
i'd like to thank all my radio listeners
the catholic church is full of shady old ministers
Cassandra Peterson, that lady's so sinister

I'm a winner sir, all i do is win
i huff and i puff all the glue i binge
i'm a big bad wolf but i'm not a lame furry
i didn't blow that house down! i swayed the jury

and these are their stories, we're an elite squad
the stylus crew's a special unit, a gang that beat boggs
i was raped at staples, i was sold a defective labeler
i had to call my boy in, you know detective stabler
Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A BONEDANCE
do the bone dance connect your steps its skeletal
hell if youll pet a cat that shat it is pettiful
i have an iron skull i smoke a bowl my mind is metal full
my kettle tool is black the pot i smoke is crack its wonderful

my under wool keeps me warm in rare form my bones are glowing
im bashful masterful, last of all my epidermis is showing
im mowing the lawn cause your gone and my gnomes are growing
im flowing red ghosts at my most special place: a colon

you think flow grows on trees lol no yo
not at this show so go home yo ho
im a pirate thought id try it rhyme lies till you buy it
id fly a kite but im to high for my guy pit

hes a cupid angel lucid angles cut corners in my dreams
stanley steam clean bubble foams roams with bowling teams
lanes are shiney grimey ceilings find me i apply stolen creams
stay smooth to lose to dance dance revolu - sheeens

Chorus

Your mother's a horse, your mother's a horse
I'm the reason, BONEDANCE

do the bone dance prance in a field with boy george
organic energy is not your enemy drink a soy surge
roy g biv is my proud homosexual friend
he's always on the phone and perplexed by men

i flex what i spend i'm all about dat cash
i recorded this track on a 2008 dell about to crash
and i make a splash in the sea witch scene
i'm ursula, i'm mean bitch mean

i'm a fiend for just dance games on the wii
i see you through my scope as i camp inside a tree
check my samurai stance as we footsie dance dance
praise the sun as i harvest and plant plants

and i can't even be believin that i really can't even
hippie trash with clothes that clash it's steely dan season
and i'm the reason your mother got smashed and dashed by charlie sheen
watch me bust a move and groove to dance dance revolu - sheeens
Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A MOLE
colon p

positioned commissioned my cul-de-sac is bitchin
my kitchen is a prison i own a pack of mittens
i wear them in the summer share them with a plumber
my toilet clogged with a log of lumber

i got wood, that makes me look pregnant
if you got lemons, send it to a peasant
it's a present, for all your homies
show me what it's like to bike when your lonley

you know me, im your number one girl
colon p stole 3 summer fun curls
i put 2 in my nose and one in my mouth
i doubt youll have fun when you leave our house

cause we bizarro and sorrow we smak it in the face
i taste like chicken in my smitten secret place
it's the curious case of benjamin bear
he had a bunch of fur, then he bought nair


illi

welcome to my hole i know im known to troll
see me on the pole when im feelin kind of bold
im told im a gentleman im cold in my dental damn
lisa needs braces face it its a dental plan

when i go down i get to the bottom of this
i have a bottle of piss i love models with tits
i coddle with fish and fondle up dicks
ronald mcdonald molests kids

i win money pour honey on my squid body
you worked on my car your car work is shotty
stop me, i came i go go
favorite bird to tame is a dodo

schoolgirl from killbill your name is go go
drive me insane id hit that fap fap fo sho
when the green light is green i claim to go go
i kidnapped santa clause and trapped him in a snow globe


pillz

take my dough body and sell it for scraps
smell all my craps sell all my hats
i saw the play cats i was foiled again
i took a big crap broke her toilet like a man

men take big shits thats what we do
turd is the word i like the word poo
im blinded by love like mr magoo
im finding a muff like your sisters vagoo

lets take a canoe to the side store
buy an old western and buy a fine whore
lay her on the floor watch me squash it
missionary position so only i can watch it

i see cow boys in hats dont clown me like that
i got power it pops got my lonley sway back
i got flour in socks yo homie dont play that
i got showered in cocks sony makes gay crap
Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A SHREW
illi

soap up the rope its a slippery slope
learn to cope with the pope for selling you dope
holy drug dealer batman phantom of the oprea
when we ridin bikes you know we tandem proper

we ridin down the street so clean and elegant
while colon p pops a squat on the trunk of an elephant
joey gladstone mr. woodchuck so damn intelligent
when hitler killed the jews who knew they'd be heaven sent

pillz

BENNIGANS! I'LL HAVE THE TURKEY O TOOLE!
FOOLS! YOU KNOW HOW I DO!
DUDE! COMPENSATION PLANS RULE!
JEWS! CONCENTRATION CAMPS, COOL!

WHY DOES THIS SUMMER CAMP SMELL LIKE BURNING FLESH!
I BET ITS A BUMMER TO DIE A DISCERNING DEATH!
CHECK THE BREAST OF A COOLER SASH BRA!
HITLER SHOULD BE A CHARACTER IN SUPER SMASH BRAWL!

chorus

your mother's a shrew, your mother's a shrew
I'm the reason for killing the jews x4

colon p

yo it's a colon p i'm a nazi wannabe
ill seduce you for free i am so sultry
in my opinion christians are culty
oh oblivion? that will be lulzy

like the holocaust i am like a boss
i will challenge you to a game of ring toss
i will bring sauce to a sporting event
if your life is boring, then, repent

jesus christ for life he's my number one homie
he is very nice and has a lot to show me
like magnets and it how it is they work
like PCP smoking clowns those icp jerks

every circus clown should be drowned in drano
i will take your heart bitches call me kano
everytime i fart i think of john stamos
he was not the antichrist but he came close

pillz

YO IM THE MAN WITH THE PLAN TO DOMINATE
CHOOSE ME FOR YOU LEADER YOU KNOW YOU WANNA NOMINATE
OBAMA OR TRUMP CAINT DO GRIPPING SHIT
I AM THE LEADER WITH THE IRON FUCKING FIST

CAUSE I AM AN ANDROID METAL SKELETAL FRAME
TAKE A POLAROID AND SEE INSIDE MY BRAIN
AND SHAKE IT SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE
LOG ALL MY CALLS LIKE A MOTOROLA SCRIPTURE

illi

in a barnyard stall i brushed the mane of your sister
your father was a horse they called him mister
no sir, i dont like it
with the pretty gritty kitty litter i wont try it

don't fight it, you know this song is ill
im a better leader than kim jong il
i chill in the sun and my fanny gets tanner
this song is pseudo wholsome like danny tanner
Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A SHEEP
yo its illithid im in sports illustrated
you know ive been berrated outdated from my town
i was found impregnanted, displayed inside a cow
i dont know just how this must sound to a crowded crowded crowd

peep the squid crown just chillin on my dome
i wish i had a beard just like a garden gnome
and i wanna go back home to my squid planet
the fish farmers panic when they find me they will can it

encase me in steel my face needs a meal
hate the taste of veal to me spam tastes real
im bizarro and brilliant making tens of millions
im chillin on your farm killin sheep by the billions

im willing to be copacetic i will make it unexpected
when i take your farm over i will not regret it
so check my delivery a squid you consider me
i'd bang judy jetson then youd imprison me

CHORUS

your mother's a sheep, your mother's a sheep
i'm the reason your farm features a creep

PILLZ

YO ITS PILLZ! IM A KILL THIS TRACK
EVERYTHING I DO IS DEVOID OF TACT
ITS A FACT THAT I FAP MY LITTLE DOUGHY WEINER
WHEN I SEEN HER ON 4CHAN IT BRIGHTENED MY DEMEANOR

AND I MEAN YOUR MOTHER JESUS BROTHER SHES A LOVELY GIRL
SHES A BARNYARD ANIMAL ITS A MAGICAL WORLD
WITH MY LITTLE DOUGHY WENIER SHEEP SEX COULNDNT BE CLEANER
SHES STD FREE LIKE SCHAFFER THE DELETER

AN ERASER OF WORLDS HES COMPLACENT AND COLD
HE WILL FACE HER TEN FOLD HE TASTES LIKE BLACK MOLD
HE'S A FEATURE CREEP IM A CREATURE CALLED P
WHEN I SEE YOUR FLOCK OF SHEEP ILL BE BALLS DEEP

AND I DONT MEAN TO BE SUCH A NASTY BOY
WHEN I WAS A KID I NAMED MY PEEPEE ELROY
WHEN I WATCHED THE JETSONS I ALWAYS FELT COZY
THE PILLSBURY ANDROID YOU KNOW ID SCREW ROSIE

colon p

yo it's colon p i love freedom cause it's free
a 5 finger discount amounts to something cheap
because freedom is weak and so is obama
one time at a party i made out with madonna

i pooped in a sauna and then things got hot
one time i gave a sponge bath to mc frontalot
i cum a lot during alien sex
i smoked some pot with damien hess

it was the best he thought i was keen
he should have seen what was inside my jeans
it's a vagina and it is bizarro
that means its a penis the size of a rhino

and i know im the feature creep
at my college im the teacher of the week
and i smell like asshole im fidel castro
if i was a jetson id totally bang astro
Track Name: YOUR MOTHER IS A HORSE
illi

get scooped up by a seagull take me from this primal mess of a nation
we're governed by birdlaw, take me to my final destination
without hesitation, i trust in the stars
take me to space, scrape the rust off my bars

i'm free now, free to spit this hot lava ink
rescued by a robot as i watched my space ship sink
and i think it's for the best, towards the wild wild west
i don't understand humans, when they smile smile less

i got style style check, at the stylus bazaar
i can't stand the taste of a mild cigar
in a while, we're far from what's left of the planet
a gaping black hole, a split second of panic

and it's tantric, this feeling unending
feed me seaweed, my achilles' heel suspending
temporarily unstable, foretold by clairvoyant sources
tempora fried fable, my parents are horses

Chorus

Your mother's a horse, Your mother's a horse
I'm the reason, your parents divorced


pillz

yo! i can cook you some sushi
that is my design, raw and juicy
and tonight we dine, in a pizza hotel
it was built, upon the grounds of hell

watch us swell, inside that pizza belly
i like my peanutbutter with seedless jelly
leave us smelly when you vomit us out
over the moon, goes a comet and a cow

AND WE LAUGHED! LIKE A PACK OF LITTLE DOGGIES!
EATING UP OUR CEREAL BEFORE IT GETS BRITTLE AND SOGGY!
AND LOG ME OUT CAUSE I'M LEAVING THE PLANET
GOTTA GET OUT BEFORE WE'RE FREEZING TO FRAGMENTS

AND MAGIC! IS JUST UNEXPLAINED SCIENCE
LEAD ME ASTRAY UNDER TRAINED GUIDANCE
YA'LL GONNA MAKE ME ACT A FOOL!
UP IN SPACE, UP IN SPACE!

col. p

i am colon p but ya'll can call me master
i'm a no limit mp mana caster
i can breathe in space because i don't have lungs
one time i installed in my jaw 59 tounges

as i sung the song of a lonely space siren
then we stole the ship of a phoney space pirate
and he cried and cried so we took him along
made him swab his own deck and cook us some prawn

my poop turned neon orange, it was an elegant dump
oh wait, that was just president trump
we flushed him down the toilet with the rest of the planet
it was fun while it lasted but it's time to get blasted

off into space, adventure awaits
check the rear view, make sure my dentures are straight
see my smile sparkle, see my sparkle shine
stylus bazaar signing off, see you next time

If you like Stylus Bazaar, you may also like: